A Coffee And A Donut…

I think this is the first blog I’ve written and rewritten so many times my head is spinning! As a result I’ve decided to share a conversation with you:

Tina, what’s going on that you can’t communicate what you are feeling? What do you want to say that is so difficult?

I decided to change the price of my book to $9.95

Awesome! Why?

I think if I lower the price more people can access it.

That’s great but you worked really hard on this book.

I know but honestly, I just want to help people. That’s the main reason I wrote “The Decision”. It’s truthful, inspiring and I think will motivate people to LIVE WITH AUTHENTICITY. That’s so important to me! I know what it feels like to live in pain and suffer on a daily basis. I want to help people find their JOY!

But don’t you want to make money? You are cutting the price of the book in half!

I know! I LOVE BEING THE BOSS! Haha, of course, I have bills to pay just like everyone else but after jogging, meditating and listening to my instinct and true intention, it is more important to make it accessible to as many people as possible.

So why is it so hard to tell them? This is a really GOOD thing! Do you think people will judge you?

They might but how can they fault me for being honest? How can they fault me for wanting to help people? It’s the right thing to do.

Do you think they’ll feel like your book is worth LESS now that you are lowering the price?

I hope not, but that is a risk I’m willing to take. “The Decision” still contains my story told with absolute HONESTY and VULNERABILITY. It gives steps on how I processed past PAIN and current STRESS and it shares how I found joy in my life and how I SUSTAIN that JOY. The content of the book hasn’t changed. All I’ve done is made it more accessible in order to get the message into more people’s hands. I think that’s a good thing!

What does your ego say?

Ooo, my ego is nasty. It says I shouldn’t lower the price of my book because it will look bad. My ego is very scared of what people will think. It’s so negative!

And what does your INSTINCT say?

My instinct just wants to help people!

What voice is stronger, fear or instinct?

INSTINCT. Fear is louder but instinct is STRONGER.

Helping people is my priority.

As mentioned in “Before and AFTER”, I will always share honestly and openly with you. I was not struggling with the choice of lowering the price of the book but rather in how to tell you. As always, the best policy for me is to be honest about it! 

I am HAPPY to tell you the book is now basically the price of a cup of coffee and a donut.

So, you can drive through Starbucks and place your daily order or purchase the book and see how it can change your life.  You can invest in Starbucks or you can invest in yourSELF.  

MY WISH IS THAT YOU ARE HAPPY, FULFILLED AND LIVING AUTHENTICALLY.

If you aren’t, perhaps “The Decision” will resonate with you and help you make the changes to find your AUTHENTIC HAPPINESS

Thank you for reading today’s blog.  I always feel so grateful that you stopped by and shared my site with others.  Please keep the emails, comments and messages flowing.  Your input is greatly appreciated.

With a smile,

Tina

Peeling Back The Layers

Remember the photo from the TV show, “Desperate Housewives” with the women standing together holding an apple?

I asked my beautiful ‘sole sisters‘ to help recreate that photo only using an ONION.

WHY AN ONION?

Well, the onion has been used to symbolize layers of emotion or experiences we’ve dealt with in life. These layers lead to the core, or TRUTH OF WHO WE ARE, so in essence, in the photo we are holding our WISDOM, INSTINCT and our EXPERIENCES in our hands. We are holding our RELATIONSHIPS, GROWTH, PAIN, JOY and every OBSERVATION that makes us who we are today.

The onion’s layers are every exchange we’ve ever had between family, friends, co-workers and strangers. The layers are OUR PERSPECTIVE on those exchanges. If we feel PAIN, DISAPPOINTMENT or LOSS that is a layer we can peel back to discover OUR TRUTH within that relationship.

The layers are a way for us to learn about ourselves and then they offer opportunities to change our behavior. The layers are our path to LIVING AUTHENTICALLY.

After peeling back layer after layer we discover LOVE is at the center.

LOVE IS OUR CORE.

LOVE IS ENERGY to which we are guided and yet we lose sight of that with each layer that covers it.

I believe we are all the same and yet all different due to our perspectives. That is the beautiful kaleidoscope of life. We each have our own layers to work through to reach our TRUTH and we each have a different way of getting through those layers. The emotions may be the same but the process can vary.

Every woman in that photo has a different story; however, we are ALL holding an onion. We stand together, symbolizing SUPPORT, LOVE, and COMMUNITY so our journey need not be alone; however, the layers we peel back belong to us as individuals. We decide when, how and to what depth we will explore, share and understand.

What we can do through this process is EMBRACE EACH OTHER knowing we’ve all got onions we are peeling, layer by layer.

With COMPASSION, EMPATHY and UNDERSTANDING we can HELP each other through this process of life and finding our AUTHENTICITY.

We can stand beside each other with our onions and not JUDGE because we are all doing the same thing. We are all LEARNING, GROWING and SHARING.

I leave you with one of my favorite quotes:

We are each of us angels with only one wing, and we can only fly by embracing one another.

With love and gratitude,

Tina

PS. Thank you for sharing my blogs! I love hearing from you personally; and believe YOUR insight and knowledge would be such a gift to others if you post some comments below and started a conversation. Let’s build a community together based on love, respect and a willingness to learn from each other!

 

Are You Hiding Your True SELF?

There are many ways to hide ourselves from others. We can use humour, sarcasm, anger, shyness, gossiping, isolation, work, money, drinking, or just generally being guarded with your thoughts and emotions.

In my 20’s, I used to hide behind a lot of foundation, eye shadow and lipstick. I couldn’t leave the house without my perfect ensemble of dress/wardrobe/makeup. I was in counselling at the time and my counsellor said,

“Well, what would happen if you left the house without makeup?”

The thought paralyzed me.

NO MAKEUP? WAS SHE INSANE?

I didn’t want to expose my ugliness to the world.  I felt safe in my makeup. Protected. What if people saw the real Tina?  That was a scary thought!

No, I couldn’t fathom it.

She gave me a challenge to not wear any makeup for 2 weeks, so one day, very scared, I tentatively walked out of my house with no makeup on. I walked the couple blocks to downtown and no one pointed. No one told me I was UGLY. No one even looked at me funny. In fact, it seemed no one cared!

I learned a valuable lesson that day.

Often times we hide ourselves from the world but the world has their own problems, their own issues to deal with and so the world doesn’t really notice! The world doesn’t pay attention to whether I am having a good hair day or bad hair day. I’m the one who puts all the importance into that detail.

If no one is paying attention to the degree we think they are; WHY ARE WE HIDING?

Usually it’s around PAIN.

We feel hurt in some way and that brings on the behaviour. I had a negative belief system in place where I thought I was this horrible, ugly, terrible person; however, that wasn’t what the rest of the world saw when I walked down the street. They saw a 26 year old woman who looked totally fine!

If you are hiding, ask yourself WHY?

  • What are you hiding from?
  • Who are you hiding from?
  • Why are you limiting your life in this way?
  • How is it working for you?

With my makeup example, I couldn’t just dash out of the house and meet a friend for coffee if I wasn’t perfectly manicured. My belief system of thinking I was ugly and, therefore, needing the makeup, totally limited my life and my relationships!

Are YOUR relationships being affected?

Are you holding back because you might get hurt? Do you TRUST your INSTINCT enough to make the right decisions for yourSELF?

When you hide, you aren’t honouring your true SELF.

You are dimming your LIGHT.

You are dimming your LIFE.

Please don’t dim your light. Don’t hide from us. We may not see you now, but we will definitely see you if you allow yourSELF to shine. By honouring your true SELF, your CORE, your SPIRIT you will find your JOY. When you find your JOY, you will be hard to miss! You will glow, radiate and have an energy that is undeniable.

There lies the gift; the gift of YOU!

This little light of mine, I’m gonna let it shine.

Let it shine, let it shine, LET IT SHINE!

With a smile,

Tina

PS.  THANK YOU for passing on the information about my book, “The Decision”. I’m passionate about spreading the word on how to manage depression and anxiety and find your JOY. If I can do it, anyone can!

Before and AFTER

TODAY IS A SPECIAL DAY.

  • It’s an opportunity
  • A new beginning
  • A choice
  • A celebration of life
  • A celebration of YOU

I didn’t always see the day as an opportunity or a beginning. I saw it as a chore, and oftentimes I would will myself through the day.

In my past, I was stuck in unhealthy patterns and allowed certain relationships to dictate my thoughts, values, morals and opinions. I had a voice but it was being silenced by the choices I was making.

I could blame others, but ultimately it was the lack of understanding and my continued poor choices that kept me SILENT, SAD and STUCK.

That was BEFORE, so what happened? What changed?

I made a DECISION and that decision created a SHIFT and that shift, CHANGED MY LIFE.

My inner voice said:

“ENOUGH!”

I was faced with the internal decision of either change my life or accept what I considered a ‘half-life’ ruled by fear, anxiety, pain and depression.

  • I wasn’t even close to reaching my potential, and I knew it.
  • I wasn’t living; I was existing at a slow rate.
  • I was an example of what happens when your spirit isn’t being heard.
  • I suffered in silence and then put on a brave face and marched through the day.

That’s tough to write because it brings a wave of emotions: I remember that life and I don’t ever want to return to it. I will do whatever it takes to keep this life I now lead: celebrating JOY, GRATITUDE, and AUTHENTICITY, honoring my INSTINCT and living in TRUTH.

What I know based on my experience is you can make a DECISION, create a SHIFT and then experience the incredible, FULL feeling LOVE, JOY and GRATITUDE brings to your life.

My eBook, “The Decision” is officially available today. This book openly tells the story of where I was BEFORE and where I am AFTER. I share deeply painful experiences and how I dealt with that pain. I share STEPS on how YOU can sustain JOY, and find your SELF despite relationship stress or money issues. I used to feel so weak and insignificant but now I feel a quiet STRENGTH and a heart full of JOY. I share how a seemingly random goal SAVED MY LIFE.

My intention with this book is to inspire, motivate and help you see another way of living that is not only possible but totally achievable!

I don’t want you to buy the book if you aren’t ready. Keep reading my blog, seek other sites, books or inspirational stories until you are ready to commit to your well-being…but know that YOU ARE WORTH THE INVESTMENT whether it’s the time it takes to write in a journal, talk to a trusted friend or read “The Decision”.

It’s not about me, it’s about YOU.

My goal is simply to share, inspire, support you and then watch you FLY.

This book has taken over a year to get to you…but it took me decades to live it and find my peace…

THANK YOU for reading this blog and sharing it with others. I appreciate YOU and your loyalty to this site.

“As we express our gratitude, we must never forget that the highest appreciation is not to utter words, but to live by them.” ~ John Fitzgerald Kennedy

My promise to you:  I live what I speak and will continue to write what I learn.

From my heart to yours,

Tina

PS. To purchase “The Decision” just simply click on the button on the top right corner or click HERE.

Where Do You Find Your Happiness?

I was writing in my journal about happiness. I’ve had some struggles with work and finances, having to move, people from my past and all the stress that can create; however, every day I pretty much wake up feeling HAPPY and GRATEFUL.

This is my actual journal entry:

“I love being so happy. I feel unbelievably blessed in my life but I feel sad for people that don’t experience this feeling on a regular basis. HAPPINESS IS A GIFT I HAD TO GIVE TO MYSELF. No one could have given this to me.”

That is the truth for me, and for you.

I can love, nurture, support, encourage and guide you but I can’t give you happiness.

Your husband, boyfriend or partner can’t give you happiness.

Your children can’t give you happiness.

Your car, your job, a new laptop, designer purse, stylish haircut or circle of friends can’t give you happiness.

YOU GIVE YOURSELF HAPPINESS.

All those other things can compliment, enhance and improve your life, but they can not make you happy.

So what makes you happy?

From my experience I will say:

  • It’s honouring who you are by listening to what you are being told on the inside: RESPECT YOUR INSTINCT.
  • It’s being mindful of your emotions, seeking to UNDERSTAND your choices and make changes for things that don’t work for you.
  • It’s healing past pain.
  • It’s expressing who you are whether it’s through dancing, wearing red lipstick or gardening.
  • It’s treating yourself with LOVE and KINDNESS and not being so internally critical and mean.
  • It’s making HEALTHY CHOICES for your body by exercising, eating fresh, unprocessed food and managing stress and anxiety.
  • It’s surrounding yourself with POSITIVE, loving people and limiting negative, angry people.
  • It’s expressing GRATITUDE for all the daily BLESSINGS in your life.
  • It’s being OPEN, HONEST, and REAL with yourself and others.
  • IT’S LIVING AUTHENTICALLY.

Happiness comes from within and can never be filled by another person.

What power you give them if they are in charge of your happiness! No, please don’t give your power away, EMPOWER yourSELF by being the SOURCE of your inner happiness.

Have you thought about what part of your life isn’t working for you?  What relationships are draining your energy?  Are you listening to your instinct or quietly choosing denial?  Is your voice being heard or is someone else speaking for you?  Do the choices you make empower you or erode your spirit? 

I understand those are difficult questions to answer but your happiness may lie in the unedited TRUTH and UNDERSTANDING of those questions.  Sometimes happiness isn’t found through beauty…sometimes happiness is found in the gritty, raw, proverbial rock bottom when you are sitting with just yourSELF, a box of tissues beside you, feeling alone, exhausted and verbalizing in the empty room how terribly unhappy you are. Your voice echoes back. You know in your gut, something has to change.

I know exactly how that feels. 

In that moment, you have a choice. 

CHOOSE YOU.

CHOOSE YOUR RIGHT TO HAPPINESS.

CHOOSE YOUR INSTINCT.

UNDERSTAND YOU ARE NOT A VICTIM; YOU HAVE THE POWER TO CHANGE YOUR LIFE.

MAKE THE DECISION TO CREATE CHANGE BY CHOOSING TO DO WHATEVER IT TAKES TO BE HAPPY ON THE INSIDE.

REMEMBER:  HAPPINESS IS A GIFT YOU GIVE YOURSELF; NO ONE CAN GIVE IT TO YOU. YOU HAVE CONTROL!

CHOOSE YOU!

With a smile and much love,

Tina

PS.  I am ready to launch my eBook called “The Decision”.  It offers steps and guidance to FIND YOUR HAPPINESS. I share my personal experience of years of depression, anxiety and toxic relationships and how I turned that around to now sustaining lasting JOY. If I can do it,  you can too!  The book will be launched in just a few days with a FREE GIFT just for you, so don’t miss out!