Living Extraordinary!

Kate Muker - Conscious Divas

What does CONSCIOUS LIVING mean to you?

Are you INSPIRED by what you are doing?

Are you aware of your PATTERNS, CHOICES, ACTIONS and SELF TALK?

SELF AWARENESS, LIVING CONSCIOUSLY, AUTHENTICALLY and with PURPOSE is a life journey we are ALL experiencing. We may be on different paths but we are here to UNDERSTAND, LEARN, GROW, SHARE, LOVE and EXPERIENCE life in its amazing spectrum of colors.

On Friday I had a lovely meeting with Kate Muker, CEO and Publisher of Conscious Divas. Her company brings women together to embrace, nurture, learn, grow and support each other in a community towards living an AUTHENTIC LIFE.

Because I am passionate about LIVING AUTHENTICALLY, I was thrilled to meet Kate and become friends. She is a beautiful person and truly embodies what she shares with others. She lives consciously and practises what she preaches, not without bumps or life lessons along the way but most certainly with AUTHENTICITY, INTEGRITY and HONESTY: Values I respect and appreciate.

Kate is holding an event for MEN and WOMEN called:

Living Extraordinary LIVE!

I am blessed to be a part of this incredible event bringing together 12 speakers, speaking for 7 minutes each with one shared vision:

Inspire passion, evoke conversation and cultivate community.

What I truly LOVE about this event is that when you look at the bios of all the speakers, (CLICK HERE) we are quite different. One may speak on yoga, another on sustainability, another about sex and another about non profit. You may purchase your ticket with one or two speakers in mind but you may receive a PROFOUND MESSAGE FROM AN UNEXPECTED SOURCE. That is the beauty of this kind of event.

I truly believe “what comes from the heart, touches the heart” and that’s why I think this evening of speakers will be so powerful.

I believe in Kate’s vision of bringing people together to create change, conversation and cultivate community.

I also believe when an event is brought together by someone who lives the values she speaks of, the event will be magical. Powerful. EXTRAORDINARY!

Thank you for passing this on to others and allowing them the opportunity to check it out. Please be aware that tickets are limited due to the intimate size of the venue. If you want more information, please CLICK HERE.

I leave you with three words that I focus on every day:

LOVE

GRATITUDE

JOY

Everyday I consciously remember the enormous power and incredible energy those simple little words create. May you be blessed beyond measure with love, gratitude and joy.

With a smile,

Tina

 

A Letter

Dear SELF:

I know I can be mean, unreasonable and I’ve disrespected you and didn’t allow your voice to be heard…

I’M DEEPLY SORRY.

THANK YOU for sticking by me when I feel LOST, ALONE, HOPELESS, SCARED and VULNERABLE.

THANK YOU for taking care of me when, sometimes, I don’t know how.

THANK YOU for showing me other options than what I was taught and that I can LEARN, GROW and CHANGE.

THANK YOU for helping me understand you are my INNER COMPASS, and you’ll always show me the way…

THANK YOU for telling me POSITIVE, LOVING and NURTURING things when the negativity rises up and loudly starts to take over.

Thank you for giving me hugs from the inside…

THANK YOU for showing me I am BEAUTIFUL and I am PERFECTION in my own complicated, talented, simplistic, complex, imperfect and unique way.

THANK YOU for helping me trust you…

THANK YOU for shining a light on my darkness…FOR BEING THE LIGHT IN MY DARKNESS.

THANK YOU for giving me STRENGTH when I thought I could go no further, HOPE when I thought it was hopeless and another day to see things do get better. You have saved my life many times. Thank you.

THANK YOU for LOVING me when I feel unlovable…

THANK YOU for showing me I have VALUE, PURPOSE and a reason for being here because you keep whispering HOPE, LOVE and COMPASSION in my ear.

Thank you for being my friend.

I love you SELF and I’m sorry I haven’t always shown you.  I recognize you are me and I am you: a loving and beautiful essence brought into this world to shine.

Thank you for not giving up on me.

All my love,

me xo

THIS BLOG IS BEST READ OUT LOUD WHILE LOOKING IN A MIRROR.

With a warm and loving heart,

Tina

PS. “This little light of mine, I’m gonna let it shine, let it shine, shine, shine, let it shine”

 

Understand Your Past To Free Your Future

“Don’t look at the past, you aren’t going that way.”

“No matter how much you revisit your past, there’s nothing new to see.”

“Forget the past; look to the future.”

Everyone has their own method in dealing with painful situations or disappointing events.  For me, those statements have not really worked and this is why…

From my personal experience, I believe that if you have pain from your past that hasn’t been dealt with, it will wait for you and eventually show up in your life. I believe it can show up in relationships, quality of life, overall happiness, how you make choices and may even manifest into illness.

Here is an unedited excerpt from my journal from 2009. This was the year I decided to change my life.

All the self help books in the world don’t really help if you don’t stop to EXAMINE your LIFE, your CHOICES, your PATTERNS, your PAST, and your CHILDHOOD.

You have to EXAMINE where you came from in order to MOVE to where you want to go. If you don’t, there will always be that part of you that is unhealed and unwell. There will always be a part of you that doesn’t UNDERSTAND what motivates you to make the CHOICES you are making.

Some of the answers from your past may not be visible at first, but keep digging. Keep making strides to learn and ultimately grow. It’s not to LIVE in the past, but rather to UNDERSTAND it. I think that is so important, at least for me it has been.”

Let me repeat that one sentence because it is KEY to this blog:

It’s not to LIVE in the past, but rather to UNDERSTAND it.

How am I able to say that I am happy today when for decades I struggled with depression and anxiety? I processed my pain.

How did I do it?

  • I did this by physically releasing the pain through jogging. I allowed mySELF to connect, feel and validate the anger, rage, frustration, shame, guilt, deep sadness or disappointment as I pushed up hills. I openly wept as I ran along the ocean, healing my soul with each step. I built strength physically and emotionally. I connected to my instinct and listened to the quiet voice within.
  • Journaling is also enormously helpful to me and by having a strong conviction to live a better life I was determined to UNDERSTAND my patterns, thought processes, negative belief systems, self sabotaging behavior and limiting choices. (I’m still on the personal growth journey) Writing gives me a way to see things clearly. 

I could not do all of that without looking back.

I don’t sit in my past, but I do acknowledge and learn from it. I can’t change it, but I can certainly change how it affects my life TODAY.

When you understand your past, you begin to release your past and all the pain attached to it. By releasing your past, you unleash your future creating a NOW that is loving, nurturing, forgiving, grateful and blessed.

Seek to understand yourSELF and you will find your JOY.

With a smile,

Tina

Be Perfect – Make A Mistake

I work with singers and they are often the most severe perfectionists.

As a singer, your body is your instrument so judging or criticizing your voice only causes tension creating physical obstacles that could be avoided. Being so fearful about making a mistake stops singers from allowing their voice to be heard. Perfectionism limits their abilities and the fear of making a mistake limits their progress.

We’ve been told:

“Learn from your mistakes.”

BUT HOW MANY OF YOU STOP YOURSELF BEFORE YOU EVEN GET THE CHANCE TO MAKE A MISTAKE?

That’s an interesting question isn’t it? What happens when you avoid mistakes by never trying in the first place? Sadly, NOTHING.

“The biggest mistake you can make in life is to continually FEAR you will make one.” ~ Ebert Hubbard

If you don’t allow yourself to make mistakes by never starting to begin with, that is called:

F E A R

It can be disguised in a thousand ways: Excuses, procrastination, perfection, lack of time or energy, no experience, money, education or help.

Ultimately there will always be a reason to not go forward, but recognizing that FEAR is the negative force that keeps your excuses and procrastination alive, gives you the insight to push through the negativity.

I recently watched a program with Jane Fonda and she says:

“Know thine enemy.”

FEAR is your enemy.

If FEAR is stopping you from applying for that job, accepting love in your life or shining your light then you need to know every detail of that enemy.

  • What are you fearful of?
  • What scares you to start the thing that you are passionate about?

I grew up with FEAR and allowed it to dominate my life for too many years. At that time, it was louder than my INSTINCT so it created ANXIETY, DEPRESSION and PANIC ATTACKS. It surrounded me with negative influences and supported self sabotaging behaviour. It kept me thinking like a victim instead of a victor.

Today, no matter how scared I am, I will push forward. Why? Because FEAR IS LIMITING and I don’t want to live a limited life.

This applies to love, career, friendships, adventures and opportunities.

Instead of not beginning because I fear making a mistake, I will try, falter, fall down, look ridiculous even but understand it’s in the getting up and trying again that wisdom, strength, and new opportunities are gained.

Just like in music, sometimes it’s the mistakes that create a beautiful melody because it’s not what you intended.

Today I encourage you to make some mistakes. Challenge yourself in an area that scares you.

BEGIN WHAT YOU ARE AFRAID TO DO.

With a smile,

Tina

Dear Gratitude Journal: I feel guilty…

Have you ever had a GRATITUDE JOURNAL?  They are a great place to write down all the things you appreciate in your life helping you understand the many BLESSINGS we sometimes overlook. It shifts our thinking from negative to positive so instead of seeing what we don’t have, we see all the amazing, wonderful things we do have in our life. 

Gratitude journals are a wonderful way to start or end your day.

Unfortunately, it didn’t always work for me.

You see, when you are DEPRESSED and have LOW SELF-ESTEEM, a gratitude journal turns into a GUILT JOURNAL.

It becomes a place to write down all the things you should be feeling grateful for but aren’t!

  • You feel GUILTY you have health while others are ill.
  • You feel GUILTY for having food or shelter when others have to walk 10 miles just to find water.
  • You feel GUILTY for being thin when others struggle with their weight. 
  • You feel GUILTY for anything good in your life because you don’t feel happy and you know you should be.
  • You feel GUILTY for any kindness bestowed on you because YOU DON’T FEEL WORTHY.

In this case, guilt is a terrible, horrible, awful emotion.

If you feel GUILTY for the BLESSINGS in your life, I want you to LISTEN to me very carefully.

GUILT feeds your DEPRESSION, ANXIETY, LOW SELF-ESTEEM, LOW SELF-WORTH and inner NEGATIVE VOICE.

GUILT feeds the BELIEF SYSTEM that you don’t deserve a HAPPY, JOYFUL and ABUNDANT life.

GUILT feeds the belief that somehow you don’t deserve EASE in your life. You must struggle or pay for your good fortune.

GUILT pushes you down and keeps you there.

GUILT never allows you to feel GOOD about yourSELF and what you’ve accomplished because you are always comparing your BLESSINGS to the hardships of others.

What is the purpose of that? NOTHING!

The only good purpose for feeling guilty is when you’ve done something wrong like lied to your spouse or committed a crime. Or perhaps you feel guilty when you behaved in a way that wasn’t authentic to you. Guilt serves the purpose of honouring your conscience and informing you to do something about it: apologize, own up, do the right thing. In that case, guilt has a good reason for being there. It is productive.

Please be aware of what type of guilt you are experiencing. If you are feeling guilty for having blessings in your life, that is your negative voice keeping you down. It is a way to feed depression, anxiety and low self-worth.

If you are experiencing guilt because you have done something that is against your morals or integrity, then it’s helping you to do the right thing. Listen and then take action.

Expressing GRATITUDE is beautiful; please don’t paint it with the ugly colors of guilt.

With a smile,

Tina

PS.  Thank you for sharing my blogs and letting people know about my book.  I make no money from my blog so passing it on is a way of paying it forward.  Thank you!